So here’s the thing…
My soul has been taken over by Ego.
(Such a lil f$&ker that guy is)
The big bad Ego gremlin has returned and has my soul held hostage in a dark and gloomy place.
It’s now my mission is rescue my soul and nourish it.
Ego has been creeping in and out for months now. It’s like he (not sure why I feel like it’s a masculine identity but I just feel that) it’s like he creeps out for a second like he’s going out for a jug of milk and the dark, negative space finally gets this light, fresh air back. It’s like I can take on the world and spirit says “fuck what others think or say about you, YOU GOT THIS YOU BAD ASS BITCH! Let’s live authentically and be our BEST SELF. Let’s be in nature, create art, help others, eat clean and move our body! Let’s connect to source and be at peace. LIFE IS SO GOOD LETS LIVE IT UP”
Then like thunder rollin in, Ego comes back to the room with a loud BOOM, hands me anxiety and says “are you kidding me? Have you looked in the mirror lately? You’ve given up, your gonna fail, you already have, so say nothing, do nothing, and don’t think for a second that your “special” in any kinda way”
And like a beaten puppy, I tuck my tail, drop my head and go back to “living”
I’m so sick of this gremlin telling me his opinions on the matters in my life. I’m done listening to him tell me I’ll never be good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, or that I will never amount to anything ….🖕🏽
I’m ready to free my soul of this monster and start being more sympathetic to my inner being and to truly love myself and my circumstances. To start enjoying the everyday tasks. To live authentically, without Ego telling me I should be jealous, envious, angry and resent that others are excelling in their personal lives.
It’s gonna be a battle.
I know this for a fact. Ego is big. He’ll try and take me down which ever way he can. But when Ego comes in, with that overbearing presence, I will stop, take a deep breath, remind soul that I am making a conscious effort to hold him off and I’m on souls side. And there will be days that he will win, but I will be gentle with myself and surround myself with the ones who truly know me and love me for who I am.
The only way to get rid of the darkness is to shine light, so that’s what I’ll do. I’ll keep my light on so bright that even if Ego tries to sneak up on me, I’ll be able to blast em.
Peace out Ego, day by day you will start to realize that you have no business in my life ✌🏼
lanaya*living 